Freethought Funnies

[NH Baritone]

Tsk tsk... not nice to point out fundamental problems with certain activities... It's considered rude and impolite by some.

On the other hand? We really should grab a beer together some day.

Cheers
DU

I have an IPA in hand right now.

[NH Baritone]

[Mr. Sluagh]

To be irrational, one must be made of meat.

They're Made out of Meat

[mikedsjr]

The cats cracked me up. Those are hilarious!

[NH Baritone]

A pastor's wife was expecting a new baby. From the pulpit, the pastor appealed to his congregation for a raise

After consideration, the congregation passed a rule that whenever the preacher's family expanded, so would his paycheck.
After 6 children, this started to get expensive and the congregation decided to hold another meeting to discuss the preacher's expanding salary. A great deal of yelling and inner bickering ensued, as to how much the clergyman's additional children were costing the church, and how much more it could potentially cost.
After listening to them for about an hour, the pastor rose from his chair and spoke, 'Children are a gift from God, and we will take as many gifts as He gives us'.
Silence fell on the congregation.
In the back pew, a little old lady struggled to stand, and finally said in her frail voice, 'Rain is also a gift from God, but when we get too much of it, we wear rubbers.'
The entire congregation said, 'Amen.'

[mikedsjr]

Pastor's Epitaph..

Go tell the church that I am dead,
but they need not shed a tear.
For thou I am dead,
I'm not as dead
As they have been for years.

[StillSearching]

A pastor's wife was expecting a new baby. From the pulpit, the pastor appealed to his congregation for a raise

After consideration, the congregation passed a rule that whenever the preacher's family expanded, so would his paycheck.
After 6 children, this started to get expensive and the congregation decided to hold another meeting to discuss the preacher's expanding salary. A great deal of yelling and inner bickering ensued, as to how much the clergyman's additional children were costing the church, and how much more it could potentially cost.
After listening to them for about an hour, the pastor rose from his chair and spoke, 'Children are a gift from God, and we will take as many gifts as He gives us'.
Silence fell on the congregation.
In the back pew, a little old lady struggled to stand, and finally said in her frail voice, 'Rain is also a gift from God, but when we get too much of it, we wear rubbers.'
The entire congregation said, 'Amen.'

As the youngest of six preacher's kids, I found this one particularly funny. I'll be sending it along to my folks.

My mom has a knick-knack with the following painted on it:

"Before I had children, I had six theories on raising them. Now I have six children and no theories."

[NH Baritone]

Here's a short parody of Expelled: No Intelligence Allowed, the Ben Stein movie that did such a poor job promoting "Intelligent Design." Click on the picture to view a YouTube video of Ben promoting the Stork Theory.





And by the way, if you haven't visited the "Expelled Exposed" site, it answers Ben Stein's supposed ID arguments, point for point.

[Mr. Sluagh]

[NH Baritone]

Are you suggesting that The Holy Spirit is the Stay-Puff Marshmallow Man?

[NH Baritone]

I had forgotten I had this picture from a caption contest I used to run.



Shouldn't the screws go through Jesus hands?

[whoosanightowl]

I had forgotten I had this picture from a caption contest I used to run.

Jesus Switchplate.jpg

Shouldn't the screws go through Jesus hands?

If there's a hell, you'll surely be there, NHB!

thank god there's not

[NH Baritone]

Happy Spring Fertility Rituals, Everyone!

[NH Baritone]

[NH Baritone]

Thanks to Landover Baptist