The Venting thread

[darkumbra]

SS... you will find no solace in this article http://www.technobility.com/docs/article091.htm except for the fact that you're not alone.

[StillSearching]

Thanks. I understand all too well that I am not alone.

I have been on the flip side of this situation. When I was in management and hiring for a position, I contacted each and every person who sent me a resume, even if just by email. Sadly I think you are right when you say that the costs of courtesy, financial and emotional, are too much in the eyes of many in business, particularly in these days of lean.

[Rian]

Here's my vent. And let me warn you, it's likely to be long and ranting with a liberal dose of self-pity so read at your own risk. I'm writing this as much for my own need to just vent as for your edification.

That's what this thread is for, so vent away! And sometimes people in similar situations can give some good advice. I'm sorry to hear about your difficulties - that's got to be an incredibly frustrating and difficult position to be in

[whoosanightowl]

StillSearching,
I am very sorry about your situation, there's a LOT of unemployment up here in Michigan too, and everyone is feeling the effects of it to some degree. Even those who remain employed (for now at least), many of them are losing benefits, cutting hours and having wages reduced.
One thing I would suggest is going back to school for something in the medical field. You may even qualify for help with tuition or government grants. Male nurses are especially needed in hospitals because of their physical strength, but there are many areas available if nursing doesn't sound right for you, and some only require a 2 year associates degree or even a program certificate. My daughter is in a 2 year nursing program at the local community college, and she'll graduate with an associates degree as a registered nurse (RN). Currently she's a certified nurse assistant (CNA), which only required a 3 week course to become certified, and she works at a hospital.
Anyway, it's just a suggestion, I know it's difficult to change professions. Good luck with whatever you decide to do.
Sue

[Atheist37]

StillSearching, maybe this will brighten your day: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jHPOzQzk9Qo

[spongebob]

StillSearching, if you had an engineering degree, I can tell you exactly where you could find very good paying work. The oil and gas sector is still hiring at a frenetic pace. I get calls every week from headhunters, but you would have to move to Texas or Louisiana since that's where the industry is. I'm talking about salaries in the $90,000 - $125,000 range.

[NH Baritone]

StillSearching, et al.

Most of us have had moments when finding a job seemed a near impossibility. Like childbirth, once the task is done, we block the pain from our memory as soon as it has passed, but that does not mean the pain didn't occur. And in this economy, the pain can be akin to birthing a 14-pound baby via a 72-hour labor.

It is a semi-tragedy that our career decisions are made by immature 20-year-olds. Guidance may be available for those who have the savvy to seek it out, but few at age 20 is have the maturity and humility to turn to a mentor or other authority figure. This means that much of our career success depends on luck and personality. Your description indicates luck was not always on your side. You entered a field known more for its creativity (which you enjoyed) than for its sincerity (in which you probably outranked your peers), and you thus excelled among people who lacked your perspective on life.

The economy is not your friend right now, and your career area is among the worst hit. (My long-distance boyfriend works for a newspaper, where due to advertising shortfalls, they are laying off reporters and photographers by the fistful.) I can only suggest, in the humblest way possible, that if you want to work for that non-profit company, call up your mother's friend and ask her to lunch. Find out what you could have done differently to get the job. In this economy, it's not to your advantage to take "no" for an answer, and even if you don't make headway with that particular non-profit group, you'll gain some insight into how you came across and where else you might turn for a similar position.

Good Luck!

[StillSearching]

Thank you all for your kind and helpful words.

StillSearching, et al.

Most of us have had moments when finding a job seemed a near impossibility. Like childbirth, once the task is done, we block the pain from our memory as soon as it has passed, but that does not mean the pain didn't occur. And in this economy, the pain can be akin to birthing a 14-pound baby via a 72-hour labor.

...while simultaneously suffering a nervous breakdown. I've been through stretches of unemployment, but never this long. The good news: I have a lot of time to think. The bad news: I have a lot of time to think.

It is a semi-tragedy that our career decisions are made by immature 20-year-olds. Guidance may be available for those who have the savvy to seek it out, but few at age 20 is have the maturity and humility to turn to a mentor or other authority figure. This means that much of our career success depends on luck and personality. Your description indicates luck was not always on your side. You entered a field known more for its creativity (which you enjoyed) than for its sincerity (in which you probably outranked your peers), and you thus excelled among people who lacked your perspective on life.

The economy is not your friend right now, and your career area is among the worst hit. (My long-distance boyfriend works for a newspaper, where due to advertising shortfalls, they are laying off reporters and photographers by the fistful.) I can only suggest, in the humblest way possible, that if you want to work for that non-profit company, call up your mother's friend and ask her to lunch. Find out what you could have done differently to get the job. In this economy, it's not to your advantage to take "no" for an answer, and even if you don't make headway with that particular non-profit group, you'll gain some insight into how you came across and where else you might turn for a similar position.

Good Luck!

Good advice received. The most rotten thing about my last job (at a newspaper, so I can relate to your bf) is that I mostly enjoyed it. My boss was the one unbearable circumstance. The guy was a horrible person and a joke of a manager. I gave him two weeks notice when I decided to leave and try self-employment. He "resigned" the Monday after my last day. You can probably imagine the way I've been playing this back in my head. "If only I had stuck it out a little longer." I know it's stupid and unhelpful to play the "what if" game, but it's difficult not to think about the fact that if I had been just a bit more patient and cautious I'd still be collecting a fatter paycheck than the ones I'm facing now and the jackass would be gone.

As I said in my first post, I still consider myself fortunate. My wife is working and her job is safe. We have health insurance. We're sort of keeping up with the bills. We've got it much better than many who are feeling the effects of the current economy.

[Atheist37]

I'm waiting to hear from my doctor about the following notations on my ECG:

Borderline Inferior Q Waves
Probable Anterior Infarc, Acute

Got a little winded mowing the lawn but I feel fine now. More tests coming in my future, I predict. There goes my ski trip.

[StillSearching]

I'm waiting to hear from my doctor about the following notations on my ECG:

Borderline Inferior Q Waves
Probable Anterior Infarc, Acute

Got a little winded mowing the lawn but I feel fine now. More tests coming in my future, I predict. There goes my ski trip.

Good, healthy heart thoughts coming your way. Hope all is well. Getting poked and prodded sure does suck.

[whoosanightowl]

I'm waiting to hear from my doctor about the following notations on my ECG:

Borderline Inferior Q Waves
Probable Anterior Infarc, Acute

Got a little winded mowing the lawn but I feel fine now. More tests coming in my future, I predict. There goes my ski trip.

A37,
Wow, that doesn't sound like fun. Hopefully the doctors will have better news for you after the tests results are in. In the meantime, let someone else do the mowing!

[darkumbra]

I'm waiting to hear from my doctor about the following notations on my ECG:

Borderline Inferior Q Waves
Probable Anterior Infarc, Acute

Got a little winded mowing the lawn but I feel fine now. More tests coming in my future, I predict. There goes my ski trip.

I had open heart surgery a few years past to repair a broken mitral valve. The morning after the surgery is worse than the event. And the pharmaceuticals they put in your take home bag are fun.

All the best

May the cosmic dice roll in your favour.

[Rian]

Keep us updated, A37! Sorry about the ski trip - I grew up skiing, but had to give it up when I got this darn chronic illness, so I know what you're feeling! There's so many great medical procedures now, though, so I hope you're up and skiing soon. If not, count your other blessings - sounds like you have some good ones!

[Atheist37]

The doctors have determined that I have not had a heart attack (I think I would remember that...) and my heart muscle is fine. But I do have coronary artery disease, the extent of which can only be fully seen with an angiogram. So that procedure is scheduled for next Wednesday. Possible side effects are stroke, cardiac arrest, amputation of a limb, and death. I'll be munching Plavix for the next several days in the effort to reduce the chances. The doctor says there is a good chance they will insert a stent if they find a single blockage. Multiple blockages may require bypass surgery. Damn I sure could use a deep fried bacon-ham-and-egg sandwich right now. Remind me again why they call it "comfort food"?

[JustJim]

The doctors have determined that I have not had a heart attack (I think I would remember that...) and my heart muscle is fine. But I do have coronary artery disease, the extent of which can only be fully seen with an angiogram. So that procedure is scheduled for next Wednesday. Possible side effects are stroke, cardiac arrest, amputation of a limb, and death. I'll be munching Plavix for the next several days in the effort to reduce the chances. The doctor says there is a good chance they will insert a stent if they find a single blockage. Multiple blockages may require bypass surgery. Damn I sure could use a deep fried bacon-ham-and-egg sandwich right now. Remind me again why they call it "comfort food"?

A37,

I hope you come through everything with flying colors, and recover from whatever they end up doing as quickly and painlessly as possible.

In July 1998 (at age 51), after two days of VERY heavy lifting, moving, and cleaning out the garage, I sat down in my recliner to rest and relax, and got a very tight sensation in my upper chest - like a 300-lb. guy was standing on me. I wasn't short of breath, but it's hard to breathe with a 300-lb. guy standing on your chest! I didn't feel any real "pain" to speak of, but it's not comfortable to have a 300-lb. guy standing on your chest! I kept telling myself, "If this doesn't go away in a few minutes, I'm going to the hospital." Then a few minutes later, I'd tell myself the same thing again. And again. After a short while, I fell asleep in the chair and woke up about 2-3 hours later. All the symptoms were gone, so I 'conveniently' forgot about it.

At my next routine doctor visit three weeks later, I mentioned it to my doctor. She decided we needed to find out what that was. Since I was grossly out of shape, and probably would have fallen down dead on a treadmill stress test, they did a thallium-drip nuclear stress test of my heart which showed I had had a minor heart attack in a fairly obscure region of my heart. They put me in a cardiac rehab program consisting of lots of closely monitored diet and exercise, and, most importantly, I quit smoking (cold turkey) after (only) 37 years!

In May 2000, I had some similar tightness sensations in my chest, and because they hadn't done a catheter exam in 1998, the cardiologist decided to go in and look around. He found one blockage of about 40%, but none more than that, and said my heart was "in normal shape for someone in my condition" (translation: for a fat, middle-aged, white guy who smoked for 37 years, never exercises, and eats like a junkyard dog, my heart was "normal"). And he looked carefully around the area where the thallium test had shown I'd had a heart attack, and said he saw "no evidence of a previous heart attack". YEA!!! So, now, when I fill out forms that ask if I've ever had a heart attack, I can answer, "No!" But it's also nine years later now, and who knows how much blockage I have....

Unfortunately, I'm still overweight, still don't exercise, and I have diabetes, high blood pressure, stage three kidney failure, hypothyroidism, and who knows what else. I take a handful of pills every morning, and they keep everything "within normal limits". I'm working on the weight and exercise. Dieting is pretty easy, but very slow. Exercise is excruciating (bad ankle, knee, lower back - plus some pretty good arthritis in lots of places), but I give it what I can.

[Sidenote: When I graduated from high school in 1964, I weighed 128 pounds and was in the best shape of my life. Exercise was FUN! I could eat anything I wanted to and LOSE weight from digesting it all! Oh, how I wish I could go back to then! I'd have SO much more sex!!! And not all by myself, either!!! ]

I hope I'm around to be reading your posts here twenty years from now! (Unless the Second Coming happens before that, of course....)

Good luck on your stuff!

Jim