Great Lyrics - Post Them Here...

[StillSearching]

Absolutely awesome! I must confess that I'm not a big fan of Zappa's music, but his insight and sick sense of humor are worthy of admiration. Good post!


EDIT: Who can forget St. Alphonso's Pancake Breakfast?

Yes indeed, here we are!
At Saint Alfonzo's Pancake Breakfast
Where I stole the mar-juh-reen
An' widdled on the Bingo Cards in lieu of the latrine
I saw a handsome parish lady
Make her entrance like a queen
Why she was totally chenille
And her old man was a Marine
As she abused a sausage pattie
And said why don't you treat me mean?
(Hurt me, hurt me, hurt me, oooooh!)
At Saint Alfonzo's Pancake Breakfast
(Hah! Good God! Get off the bus!)
Where I stole the mar-juh-reen . . .

Saint Alfonzo
Saint Alfonzo
Saint Alfonzo
Saint Alfonzo
Ooo-ooo-WAH . . .

[StillSearching]

Tool - Lateralus

Found a great home-made video for this song on YouTube. For you math and science geeks out there, the song uses Fibonacci numbers in both meter and lyrics (explained in the vid via subtitles), and the video features some tremendous space photos and animations. WARNING: Tool is hard rock. If it's too loud, yer too old!

[StillSearching]

Billy Joel - River of Dreams

In the middle of the night
I go walking in my sleep
From the mountains of faith
To a river so deep

I must be looking for something
Something sacred I lost
But the river is wide
And it's too hard to cross

Even though I know the river is wide
I walk down every evening and I stand on the shore
I try to cross to the opposite side
So I can finally find what I've been looking for

In the middle of the night
I go walking in my sleep
Through the valley of fear
To a river so deep

And I've been searching for something
Taken out of my soul
Something I would never lose
Something somebody stole

I don't know why I go walking at night
But now I'm tired and I don't want to walk anymore
I hope it doesn't take the rest of my life
Until I find what it is that I've been looking for

In the middle of the night
I go walking in my sleep
Through the jungle of doubt
To a river so deep

I know I'm searching for something
Something so undefined
That it can only be seen
By the eyes of the blind

In the middle of the night

I'm not sure about a life after this
God knows I've never been a spiritual man
Baptized by the fire, I wade into the river
That is running to the promised land

In the middle of the night
I go walking in my sleep
Through the desert of truth
To the river so deep

We all end in the ocean
We all start in the streams
We're all carried along
By the river of dreams

In the middle of the night

[StillSearching]

The Toadies - I Come From The Water

I come from the water
I crawled upon the shore
I left my brothers there
I got what I came for

I sucked that hot air in
and rolled upon the sand,
emerged beneath the sun
to be a man

I come from the water
I come from the water
I come from the water
I come from the water yeah

I come from the water
that weren't no easy thing
It's more than nature
It's like my destiny

I stood upon these legs
and held my head up high
and burned beneath the sun
to start a new life

I come from the water
I come from the water
I come from the water
I come from the water yeah

Life in the desert
Just to be together
The sand forever
The same forever

It moves beneath me
It pulls my body
My pulse beats hotter
so far from the water

I love to see the sun
in spite of all it's done
I pray for shade and rain
I pray to live again

I come from the water
I come from the water
I come from the water

[NH Baritone]

Thanks to Monty Python:

All Things Dull and Ugly

All things dull and ugly,
All creatures short and squat,
All things rude and nasty,
The Lord God made the lot.

Each little snake that poisons,
Each little wasp that stings,
He made their brutish venom.
He made their horrid wings.

All things sick and cancerous,
All evil great and small,
All things foul and dangerous,
The Lord God made them all.

Each nasty little hornet,
Each beastly little squid—
Who made the spikey urchin?
Who made the sharks? He did!

All things scabbed and ulcerous,
All pox both great and small,
Putrid, foul and gangrenous,
The Lord God made them all.

[Brad]

OK, I'll play.
Several of the Python songs are classic (not sure I should post lyrics to them) and I have a couple of Randy Newman faves, too, that fit this bill.
But I have to say on page one in my personal hymnal would be this Austin Lounge Lizards tune:

Jesus Loves Me But He Can't Stand You
(© Don Peters / BMI)

I know you smoke, I know you drink that brew
I just can't abide a sinner like you
God can't either, that's why I know it to be true that
Jesus loves me -- but he can't stand you

I'm going straight to heaven, boys, when I die
'Cause I've crossed every "t" and I've dotted every "i'
My preacher tell me that I'm God's kind of guy; that's why
Jesus loves me -- but you're gonna fry

God loves all his children, by gum
That don't mean he won't incinerate some
Can't you feel those hot flames licking you
Woo woo woo

I'm raising my kids in a righteous way
So don't be sending your kids over to my house to play
Yours'll grow up stoned, left-leaning, and gay; I know
Jesus told me on the phone today

Jesus loves me, this I know
And he told me where you're gonna go
There's lots of room for your kind down below
Whoa whoa whoa
Jesus loves me but he can't stand you...

[stickmangrit]

I just came upon this thread and i can't believe no one added Frank Zappa.

first Zappa song i ever heard, might be offensive to some, but here it is:

Hey there, people, Im bobby brown
They say Im the cutest boy in town
My car is fast, my teeth is shiney
I tell all the girls they can kiss my heinie
Here I am at a famous school
Im dressin sharp n im
Actin cool
I got a cheerleader here wants to help with my paper
Let her do all the work n maybe later Ill rape her

Oh God I am the american dream
I do not think Im too extreme
An Im a handsome sonofabitch
Im gonna get a good job n be real rich

(get a good
Get a good
Get a good
Get a good job)

Womens liberation
Came creepin across the nation
I tell you people I was not ready
When I fucked this dyke by the name of freddie
She made a little speech then,
Aw, she tried to make me say when
She had my balls in a vice, but she left the dick
I guess its still hooked on, but now it shoots too quick

Oh God I am the american dream
But now I smell like vaseline
An Im a miserable sonofabitch
Am I a boy or a lady...i dont know which

(I wonder wonder
Wonder wonder)

So I went out n bought me a leisure suit
I jingle my change, but Im still kinda cute
Got a job doin radio promo
An none of the jocks can even tell Im a homo
Eventually me n a friend
Sorta drifted along into s&m
I can take about an hour on the tower of power
long as I gets a little golden shower

Oh God I am the american dream
With a spindle up my butt till it makes me scream
An Ill do anything to get ahead
I lay awake nights sayin, thank you, fred!
Oh god, oh god, Im so fantastic!
Thanks to freddie, Im a sexual spastic
And my name is bobby brown
Watch me now, Im goin down,
And my name is bobby brown
Watch me now, Im goin down

[JustJim]

Jesus loves me.
This I know,
For the Bible tells me so.
Little ones to him belong.
They are weak but he is strong.

Yes, Jesus loves me!
Yes, Jesus loves me!
Yes, Jesus loves me!
The Bible tells me so.

<<gag>>

Jim

[NH Baritone]

FAR
by George Hrab

You ponder the universe and a look comes 'cross your face.
You try to fathom distances of all the stuff in space.
But you can't wrap the bacon of your mind around the fig.
Of all the terms required to describe how big is big.

So let me get specific, and use words scientific.
Go whip out your thesaurus, for this exacting chorus

[CHORUS] This stuff is far, [it's really far!] This stuff is far far far away.
We're talkin' far, [like über far!] you can't get there by car in a day.
It's super duper crazy far but not just pulsars, quasars and stars.
I mean it's far, far, far, if there's some doubt listen to us shout [THIS STUFF IS FAR!]

I sense all the explosions going off inside your brain.
As your mind gets blown by what I just did explain.
Sorry if my words might drive you all insane,
But that's what happens when precision is your middle name.

So with an exacting factor, like some sextant or protractor
Using details quite semantic, I'll show how huge is this gigantic.

CHORUS

...far too big to explain in any concise ways,
it might just have to take 365 days.

I hope that I have offered up some technical assistance,
And haven't caused your ticker too much ventrical resistance.
But you have got to listen and trust my insistence
That I am very accurately describing the distance.

CHORUS